By alice Worthy, the modern doula
When it comes to birth, everyone seems to have an opinion, especially the older generations. Maybe you’ve heard things like, “Birth is just something you have to suffer through,” or “Back in my day, we didn’t need all this support!”
But here’s the thing: birth is changing, and so are our views on it (thank goodness!).
As a modern doula on the Central Coast, I see more and more families questioning the old ways and asking, “Is there a better way to do this?” The answer is a loud and resounding yes. From how we view pain, to what support we deserve, to where and how we birth – modern birth is about choice, confidence, and connection.
So let’s dive into some of the biggest shifts in birth culture – from old–school beliefs to new–school truths that are transforming the way we approach one of the most powerful days of our lives.
Old School:
Birth is something horrible that you just have to endure in order to have a family
New School:
Birth can be the best day of your life and has the power to transform.
For decades, birth has been framed as something women simply survive. Words like “traumatic,” “awful,” or “just get through it” have dominated the narrative. But modern birthing people are flipping that script. Birth isn’t something to fear, it’s something to own. With the right preparation, support, and environment, birth can be powerful, transformative, and dare I say it, even fun!!! I’ve witnessed first hand how education, mindset, and support can turn fear into confidence and pain into power.
Old School:
Once a C–section, always a C–section
New School:
Once a C–section, now maybe a C–section, if medically required or chosen by the woman
For years, the myth persisted: if you’ve had one caesarean, that’s your only option going forward. But VBACs (Vaginal Birth After Caesarean) are not only possible – they’re often safe and encouraged. Modern maternity care recognises that every birth is unique, and your past doesn’t have to dictate your future. You have options, and as your doula, I’ll support you to explore them to find what’s best for your circumstances.
Old School:
We didn’t have any support and you turned out okay!
New School:
Nobody should do motherhood alone and you deserve support and nurturing through this huge life transition
Motherhood has always been challenging, but doing it in isolation makes it even harder. The old narrative of “suffering in silence” is slowly but surely being replaced with one of community, care, and connection.
You deserve a postpartum plan, emotional support, and rest. You deserve someone in your corner, and that’s where doula care shines – especially in the fourth trimester.
Old School:
Home birth is incredibly dangerous and you’re crazy for choosing it
New School:
Homebirth is statistically safe and a valid and reasonable choice for many women
When attended by qualified midwives and supported appropriately, home births are not only safe—they often come with lower rates of intervention, trauma, and poor health outcomes. It’s not about rejecting medical care; it’s about choosing the right setting for you where you feel most safe. If you’re low–risk and aligned with a natural approach, home birth on the Central Coast is a calm, empowering and extremely safe option for many.
Old School:
You can’t plan birth, so don’t bother
New School:
A birth plan is a communication tool, not a guarantee
A birth plan doesn’t mean you’re rigid. It means you’re informed. It opens conversations with your care team, sets expectations, and keeps your preferences front and centre, even when things go off script. Planning for birth doesn’t mean controlling it – it means walking in with clarity and confidence. You can read more about how to create an epic birth plan with my eBook, The Modern Birth Plan.
Old School:
Medical interventions are increasing because they’re saving lives
New School:
I trust my body, my instincts, and the evidence
While some interventions are absolutely lifesaving, the rising rates of induction, caesarean, and assisted deliveries don’t always reflect better outcomes. The World Health Organisation notes that many
interventions are overused in high – income countries such as ours. We’re reclaiming the right to question, to pause, and to trust our bodies and instincts rather than taking anything and everything that’s offered without informed consent.
Old School:
Birth is something that happens to you
New School:
Birth is something you can participate in
You’re not just a passenger on this journey, you. should be the driver. Whether you’re birthing in hospital or at home, this is your experience. When you’re supported, informed, and listened to, birth becomes a rite of passage to be respected, not a medical event.
So while ideas about birth may differ across generations, cultures, and personal experiences, what matters most is that each person feels informed, supported, and empowered to make the choices that are right for them.
Alice, The Modern Doula, helps modern women get what they want in birth & beyond, without the woo–woo! Creator of Birth Different, the birth course without the boring bits, she’s now increased her client load for 2025. Ready to birth differently? Contact Alice today.